Monday, December 17, 2007

Hostel 2

Hostel: Part II

Monday, December 10, 2007

Jackass: The Movie

Why did I watch this?
Did anyone ask "why" before the first people sat down to preview Eraserhead?
Did anyone ask "why" before they saw the unveiling of the Mona Lisa?
Did they ask it when first they stepped into the Sistine Chapel to witness Michaelangelo's magnificence? Did they ponder on the purpose behind The Resurrection Of Christ and interrogate Raphael about it's meanings, until he could take it no more?
Did they ask Donatello why, of all the turtles, he spent so much time creating dumbass machines instead of eating pizza and being awesome like the rest of them? I mean, C'mon, even Leonardo could chill out once in a while, guy!
Did they ask Isaac Newton why he was going off to sit under a tree "till something inspirational happens"?!
Did they ask Einstein why he was remembered more for being a little bit crazy than being a little bit of a genius? I guess not since he'd be dead by then...
Did they ask why before Martin Luther King stepped before a vast audience gathered to hear him and delivered his "I have a dream" speech?

They probably did, I guess...

Wednesday, December 5, 2007

Wrong Turn 2

If you...

Are thinking...

Of Watching...

This film...


It doesn't even deserve a genuine clip or even a clip pretending it's from the film.
Seriously. This film was fucking aweful.

Tuesday, December 4, 2007

Zombie Town

Gotta make a move to a town that's right for me.
Town to keep me movin',
keep me groovin' with some energy.
Well, I talk about it, talk about it,
talk about it, talk about it.
Talk about, talk about, talk about movin'.
Gotta move on.
Gotta move on.
Gotta move on.
Won't you take me to Zombie Town.
Won't you take me to Zombie Town.

Zombies + Small Town = Killing People You Know!

This review sucks...
Zombie Town is a small independent film, which seems to have been made and is set in Vermont.
It has a great small-town feel that other zombie films don't which almost makes you reflect on the difficulties which might be faced if you had to fight zombies that you know, but instead makes you think "Oh my God I could totally kill my boss and that dick from across the street!"
The soundtrack sucked, but I don't like many horror soundtracks so I'll let that slide, especially considering this had a fair amount of gore.

Uh... um... HI OH!