Thursday, August 23, 2007

The Number 23

The Number 23 is precisely 13.0434782608695217391304347826 less intense than 300. Take away all the Spartans, the blood, the swords and divide the epicness (Not a word! Why not? What word would be correct?) by 13.0434782608695217391304347826 and what's left?
Jim Carrey getting intensely confused and agitated for a couple hours!
The basic premise is that Jim Carrey's character reads a book that has striking resemblances to his own life, this makes him look deeper into it and eventually he's spotting similarities between the books key theme (The number 23) and everything from the letters in his name to the number of pairs of shoes his wife owns, making him have a complete meltdown and become obsessed with the number 23 to devastating ends! But a number can't really be dangerous! Or can it?
Who cares!
This was a pretty damn good film but in all honesty I had it so hyped up in my mind that I thought it was going to be my next favorite. The whole film is pretty amazing, the plot is inventive, Jim Carrey's acting is once again surprisingly gripping (Just like in The Mask) and the directing gets the feeling of paranoia down. Overall a great film but I feel the ending felt slapped together a little bit... the ending, as far as being in a story sense, is flawless but it's more the execution of it in the film that I feel wasn't as gripping as it could have been... maybe I'm just getting tired of twist endings (Don't give me that "Oh my God! I didn't know it had a twist ending! Thanks a lot, asshole!", every film in existence has a twist ending these days, it's a prerequisite before a script is even looked at by a director) or maybe this film just executed it wrong...

Here's my opinion on films with good twist endings (Look away now if you don't want to know what films have twists)

Sixth Sense
Twelve Monkeys
The Others (Awesome!)
Film Geek (Awesomer!)
Saw
Star Wars V: The Empire Strikes Back
Fight Club
The Machinist

Here's my opinion on films that demonstrate fucking awful (or at least, they display twist ending that seem forced or there just for the sake of having a twist) twist endings

Saw 3 (This is top of the list because it was the worst execution of a twist ending I have ever had the misfortune to witness)
High Tension
The Village (Great film otherwise, and actually had a good mid-film twist, maybe the ending twist was unnecessary because of it)
The Number 23
Star Wars III: Revenge Of The Sith (Ok, not a twist because you know it's going to happen but my God what a fucking atrocious film this was!)

I Wasn't The Only One To Wittily Connect The Number 23 and 300

And here's a clip of Jim Carrey trying to scare you!



Anyway, this is a great film that was let down by a twist ending, unlike some of those movies which were terrible films that had a twist ending to try and make them good. So in spite of that major complaint, the number 23 still gets:





The Number 23's Website

Sunday, August 19, 2007

Moon Of The Wolf

"Did The Wild Dogs Do It To Her? Depends What You Mean By "Do It"."

This was a TV movie made in 1972, but we had the good fortune to find it in Wal-mart (or possibly the dollar store) on a double feature disc, coupled with "Dr Jekyl Vs The Werewolf", which, if it turns out to be as good as "Moon Of The Wolf" will make it well worth the $1 we spent on the DVD!

When you pay $1 for a movie (Never mind 2) you expect a pile of turd that's worth the buck just to laugh at the atrocious nature of the film-making and more or less have your own version of Mystery Science Theater 3000 in your living room as you pick at holes and mock the cheesy special effects and piss-poor acting! So when a movie turns out to be watchable, well scripted and reasonable it's almost a dissapointment.
"Moon Of The Wolf" is like a brilliant blend of the two! It has enough poor acted moments and cheesy lines to inspire a few sneaky jabs at the writer's expense but it has enough of a plot (plot by werewolf movie standards, let's not get carried away here!) and is together enough to be enjoyed as a film in itself and not just a giant freak show of a movie!
The movie basically follows the same plot as about a million other werewolf movies where some scared townsfolk don't know what's going on while a hapless hero slowly puts things together just in time to save a woman who he just met and started to like during the movie.
The special effects are lame, the acting is sub-standard but hey, it only cost 50 cents!?
We'll see if Dr Jekyl Vs The Werewolf lives up to it's 50 cents...



Moon Of The Wolf's Wikipedia article

Monday, August 6, 2007

The Cave

Creature Feature x (Fair CGI + Poor Acting) / PG-13 Rating + (Predictable Plot x Overly Menacing Monsters)/Vague Implications Of A Poor Sequel =

THE CAVE

The Cave = Fairly Decent Horror Film - (R-Rating + Gore)

The bad news is I couldn't find a trailer for this film (I didn't look very hard)
The good news is I found this music video featuring the film instead!
Don't let the music put you off seeing the film , it wasn't too bad, just as cheesey as you might expect a creature feature to be.






The Cave's Shitty Website

Sunday, August 5, 2007

The Hills Have Eyes 2 (2007)

This was, obviously, a sequel to the remake of The Hills Have Eyes. It was not, as far as I can tell, a remake of The Hills Have Eyes Part II from 1985, which was a sequel to the original Hills Have Eyes, but followed a different story (From what I read, I haven't seen The Hills Have Eyes part II (1985)). The Hills Have Eyes 2 (2007) follows a group of morons who decide to wander into the desert because the army told them to, or something. Despite having a very similar title to The Hills Have Eyes (Similar to both the 1977 title and the 2006 title, which were both very similar to each other also) The Hills Have Eyes 2 (Not part II) differs from it's predecessor(s?) in a few key ways.

First my thoughts on the original (remake. The original remake from 2006, not 77, k?)
Upon watching The Hills Have Eyes I was fairly surprised at what a good remake it was, in this day and age it's common to see a film that's a rendition or remake or sequel to something fairly awesome only to discover the filmmakers have taken it in a ridiculous and vomitous direction away from the original ideas and into a steaming pile of turd. The Hills Have Eyes did a great job remaking the classic '77 version, keeping most of the elements that made it both brutal and entertaining, while changing just enough to make it also likable by a modern audience. Note that I say "also", the filmmakers seemed to make sure that it also appealed greatly to fans of the original.

Upon watching The Hills Have Eyes 2 I realized it sucked ass

The Hills Have Eyes wisely chose a director who had at least shown once (with Haute Tension) how grizzly he could make on screen violence

The Hills Have Eyes 2 chose someone who sucked ass (Directed a KoRn video)

The Hills Have Eyes was gripping enough to keep you in a fairly tense mood throughout and actually managed to make you feel some sort of empathy for the main characters much like older horror films so that the audience is, to some degree, genuinely fearful for what may become of them, not just hoping they all snuff it in interesting ways. Indeed, I do believe that it was far more empowering when the good guys were taking out the bad guys than the other way round, which is something I think is important, but sadly almost always lacking, in horror films but seems to be common in Wes Craven's works (Wes Craven wrote and directed the original Hills Have Eyes).

The Hills Have Eyes 2 sucked ass

Look at this trailer!

I remember seeing it and thinking: "Awesome, they're making a new one and it looks like they're trying to make it creepy and cool"
But hey! That scene isn't in the film
Those people aren't in the film
That music isn't in the film
Unlike the first one, they didn't even attempt to use vaguely cool (different, new, interesting) music, opting instead for a nu-metal sound track
Fuck this film
Fuck it right in the ear




The Hills Have Eyes Official Website (Includes the sequel)